Eulogy for the wife.

Today we gather here to celebrate the life of a strong selfless woman, My wife of over 30 years, Elizabeth Browne. Liz died the way she lived, working hard for something much greater than her, me and my dog Theodore. 

Most people remember Liz as a gentle fragile creature who would not say boo unless she was specifically asked to. But what most people don’t know is that she had a strong back and an excellent work ethic, like no other indentured woman I’ve known.

She was able to put up with and work in some truly horrible conditions which would have broken a weaker sole. And while I provided those conditions without apology, there were a few times where she took to questioning her role in the family. An attitude I would break as soon as it appeared, In such a way that it would usually be stretches of years which would go by without even a harsh word against me. This is one of the reasons I can truly say she was a loved cog in the wheel of our family.

Some will call me weak for this but there were the odd Saturdays where I’d give her the afternoon off to go wonder in the back yard. This had to stop of course once I heard she left one of Theodore’s shits out there on the lawn, and while she denied she knew about it I knew I had to reign in her freedom for the sake of the family unit.

Some people over the years have questioned my judgement on why I decided to completely cut her off from her family, but her and I both knew it made her flighty and wishing for something more in life. Which of course could not be tolerated.

She had a sharp mind, which I didn’t like much and was one of her lesser qualities, but all in all her submissive nature and unrelenting stamina made me feel like I made the right choice in marrying her over some of the girls considered to be of a finer stock, and I’m sure if I did pick one of those girls I would not have been able to get away with half the stuff I was able to with Liz. and for that, I am supremely thankful.

I think looking back she would have preferred someone more affectionate that liked touching a woman’s soft skin, but that wasn’t the man I was and I wasn’t going to pretend otherwise.

I know most of you haven’t seen Liz in many years, I just want you to know she was far prettier alive then how she looks now as a corpse, I would never allow her to wear makeup in life so I see little reason why she now should be covered in it and it sickens me to my soul that my wife would be treated in such a way at the hands of somebody else.

Liz, we will miss you especially since the new wife is not arriving till Thursday.

  • Ricky N Browne