#all

Sneak preview of my entry for this year's (2026) One Eye Film Festival.

Grammarly wants me to write properly, fuck you, Grammarly; that's how I speak it, so that's how I write it.

My laptop has shit itself. I have to keep it running, or I have to go through a heap of rigamarol to get it started again. I thought I'd fixed it before bed, but when I woke up at two am it wouldn't turn on; I finally figured out I had to spin around three times while holding my nose. Point being that it's a good excuse to buy a Chromebook and a new phone for some reason. I've set my Windows laptop to enviro mode and plan on keeping it running, so now it's an office computer, not an everywhere computer. You'll be happy to know we are installing a solar battery, so don't freak out.

Everyone should have the attitude that God is with them, he has their back, but also that you don't deserve it; a person who believes God is with them, and they are deserving of it, is a little too self-righteous for my small, frail mind.

I'm the husk of a man who never was and never will be.

I've finally started experiencing cognitive decline. Ricky can't think right! Holy fuck, it's happening. At this rate, in the next ten years, I'll be blaming black people and immigrants for everything, and might even think Elon Musk is not a big smelly turd. Fantastic, just fucking great, put me in a home and turn on the tele.

I'm fifty next year and look and feel my age, if not older; who would have thought, fat, lazy guy heads to an early death. I have so much to do in the short time I have left; that being said, three-quarters of the time I don't want to do it; I just want to lie down in bed or on the couch and watch a show about a detective who figures out who murdered young Jo-anne before disposing of her body in a dumpster behind McDonald's.

It's surprising how many old people don't grow wiser as they age; you can tell by how much they talk. The wise ones will ask questions and have a dialogue. The old fools just don't shut up; they don't want to know anything. They already know; the tele told them so. I hope to God I'm not one of these oldies that can't shut the fuck up.

I'm far too kind to tell people to shut their mouth hole, but I think it. Oh, boy, do I think it!

I'm writing this because I don't feel like doing anything else, and I have to get back into the swing of writing every day, just pouring my heart out onto the page. The problem I face is that I'm too content with life; that's great for a sense of personal peace, but it lacks the drama for content. I have no itch to scratch, that or I'm not digging deep enough. There's a lot to be angry about in the world, but I'm zen as fuck; I'm not going to let a glacier collapse in Tibet ruin my day. I've done all that before, getting wound up about human greed and ineptitude.