Log--9902-07/08/2025-Ricky-Browne
When the Framework Starts to Slip
I’ve shut down this week. Something in me has gone quiet.
There are a few possible causes. I stopped drinking again on Sunday, and I might be dealing with withdrawal. My energy is low and my thinking feels foggy.
I’m also about to be interviewed by Sharon from the local paper. That’s stirred up self-doubt. Being seen like that makes me question who I am and what I’m doing.
On top of that, becoming a Christian has unsettled me more than I expected. It’s forcing me to re-examine how I relate to the world. I feel like parts of my old mental framework are loosening, and that scares me. I was proud of that framework. It carried me a long way.
Right now I feel like I’m languishing. There’s no clear path forward. Even writing feels distant. I don’t want to force meaning out of this.
I’ll stop here.
Published 7-8-2025
I’ve shut down this week. Something in me has gone quiet.
There are a few possible causes. I stopped drinking again on Sunday, and I might be dealing with withdrawal. My energy is low and my thinking feels foggy.
I’m also about to be interviewed by Sharon from the local paper. That’s stirred up self-doubt. Being seen like that makes me question who I am and what I’m doing.
On top of that, becoming a Christian has unsettled me more than I expected. It’s forcing me to re-examine how I relate to the world. I feel like parts of my old mental framework are loosening, and that scares me. I was proud of that framework. It carried me a long way.
Right now I feel like I’m languishing. There’s no clear path forward. Even writing feels distant. I don’t want to force meaning out of this.
I’ll stop here.
Published 7-8-2025